The Power of “You Try First”

One of the best things my parents ever did for me was to teach me to be my own advocate as well as being a great pair of advocates on my behalf. My parents made sure I was helping around the house, taking care of pets, getting schoolwork done on a timely schedule, and involved in activities like swimming and summer camps.

I remember my mom, a pediatrician, would leave for work on the weekends, and leave lists of chores for my sister and I to finish while she was away. If I asked for help with something, she would say, “Pretend I’m not here, and you try first, and then I will help you.”

Having this structure and expectation of at least trying something, even if it proved difficult, helped me develop confidence and a can-do attitude. I was also educated about my differences at a very young age so that I could better understand them, as I got older. This helped me become more comfortable with myself and better able to articulate my needs and challenges to others.

I may not have liked having to struggle with putting socks on at 10 or 12 for at least 10 minutes, but today that attitude has lead me to becoming more independent and far more able to do things on my own.

I think there is beauty in challenging a child, especially a child with a disability. However, you have to know his or her limits and make the task fun. I think there is a vast difference in challenging a child versus challenging him or her until they break. I feel really proud when I get up in the morning, make my own bed, get a shower, make breakfast, catch the bus to work with my service dog, and go about my day just like anyone else! I want you to know that as parents and professionals, you too, can shape a child’s future and teach them that they have the power to make their own decisions and live their own lives the way they would like to live them.

Resources: All are available through the Library at the Indiana Institute on Disability and Community.

Just When I Need It: Tips and Tools for Quality Service (Kit)
The Special Needs Advocacy Resource Book
Families, Disability, and Empowerment (Book)

Thanks for reading!
Adria

Hello!

My name is Adria Nassim. Welcome to my bi-monthly blog, Adria’s Notebook. The aim of my bi-monthly blog is to provide insight in disability through the lens of my personal experiences.

I am 31 years old and am originally from Floyd County, Indiana. I now live in Bloomington full time with supplemental supports in the community and help from my autism/mobility service dog, Lucy, named for The Beatles’ “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.” I became involved in self-advocacy at a very young age as a result of my experiences with my peers with and without disabilities. I grew up with cerebral palsy, a learning disability, and an autism spectrum disorder, and received both regular and special education services in school. I also received weekly physical therapy sessions from the time I was 14 months old to help with cerebral palsy.  

I finished high school in May of 2005 and then went on to college at Brescia University, a small, private liberal arts college in Owensboro, Kentucky. I graduated in May of 2010 with a Bachelor of Arts in English and Spanish.

I knew I wanted to use my life story to help create a better world for children and young people with disabilities. Throughout the academic year, I visit classrooms at Indiana University Bloomington, Ivy Tech Community College, and speak to parents and professionals about my experiences with disabilities. I am employed at the Indiana Institute on Disability and Community as a self-advocate part time and also write a bi-weekly column for Bloomington’s city newspaper, The Herald Times, about autism and disability published every Tuesday.

I am really excited about  the opportunity to share my experiences with students, parents, professionals, and those with and without disabilities, in hopes of  helping them become better prepared and more excited about serving the next generation of children, adolescents, and adults with disabilities.  

Thanks for reading!

-Adria